Maria Bello comes out as a lesbian, reveals long-term relationship


Actress Maria Bello has not only come out as a lesbian, but also revealed she is in a long-term relationship with her best friend, referred to only as Clare.

On Friday, November 29, the New York Times published an op/ed titled “Coming Out as a Modern Family.” In it, Bello explains her decision to begin dating Clare, as well as her experience of coming out to her 12-year-old son Jackson.

Bello said that she could tell Jackson knew she was hiding something from him, and eventually decided it was time to tell her son the truth.

“This was the moment I had been anticipating and dreading for months,” wrote Bello. “I took a deep breath, knowing that my answer, and his response, would have an impact on our lives for a very long time…I was with someone romantically and I hadn’t told him. I had become involved with a woman who was my best friend, and, as it happens, a person who is like a godmother to my son.”

The actress—best known for her work in “Coyote Ugly” and “Prisoners”—began a relationship with Clare, her best friend, a year prior to coming out to her son. Bello said she had an epiphany while going through old journals and reading entries about past relationships.

“I read about the handful of men and the one woman I had been in romantic relationships with, passages rife with pain and angst,” wrote Bello. “It seemed when I was physically attracted to someone, I would put them in the box of being my ‘soul mate’ and then be crushed when things didn’t turn out as I had hoped.”

She added: “As I continued to look through photos, I came across a black-and-white one of my best friend and me taken on New Year’s Eve. We looked so happy, I couldn’t help but smile…It didn’t occur to me, until that soul-searching moment in my garden, that we could perhaps choose to love each other romantically.”

Bello confessed she was worried about coming out to her “traditional” Philadelphia family, but said that the conversation went much smoother than she’d anticipated.

“My father’s response came between puffs of his cigar while we sat on the roof of a casino in Atlantic City. ‘She’s a good girl, good for you,’ he said,” wrote Bello.

Bello also wrote that she still has a positive relationship with her ex, the father of her son, Dan McDermott.

“Jack’s father, Dan, will always be my partner because we share Jack. Dan is the best father and the most wonderful man I’ve ever known,” she wrote. “Just because our relationship is nonsexual, doesn’t make him an less of a partner. We share the same core values, including putting our son first. My more recent ex, Bryn, remains my partner because we share our activism. And Clare will always be my partner because she is also my best friend.”


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